For many kids, changeover is the hardest part of the week. It's the moment they see both parents together, and they pick up every bit of tension. Children exposed to hostility between parents are more likely to struggle with anxiety and behaviour (Harold and Sellers 2018). Changeover is where you can protect them most.

What helps

• Keep it short. Hello, hand over, goodbye. Handovers are not the time to discuss problems.

• Use a neutral place if needed. School, childcare or a public spot means the kids move between places, not between arguing parents.

• Pack the bag the night before. Include anything they love, like a toy, a jumper or their charger. Familiar things make the move easier.

• Be on time. Being late, or waiting, builds stress for everyone.

• Stay positive in front of them. "Have a great time with Mum, I'll see you Sunday." Give them permission to enjoy the other home.

• Expect a settling period. Many kids are quiet, clingy or cranky for a few hours after changeover. That's normal. Keep the first evening calm and simple.

If handovers have become unsafe or keep turning into conflict, ask about a supervised changeover service through Relationships Australia or your local Family Relationship Centre.

Find out more: Relationships Australia · Raising Children Network